Monday Manifesto: Blissbombed aka Stephanie St. Claire

For today’s Monday Manifesto Day I want to share my journey with this amazing woman that I have never met and the beginning of her Blissbombed Manifesto that started it all..

A few years back my path collided with hers. But little did I know until recently in a Coaching Session that our paths have been rotating around each other for years. While we were discussing a variety of things come to find out we have oft times been growing up, living, being or doing things in the same neighborhoods in California and when I was even in New York for a time. It was funny to hear, but at the same time confirmed to me even more that the universe was telling me

“You need to learn from this woman.”

When I DID happen to connect with her for the first time like I think for many women it might be to get over a heartache or because things are not right in their life. I, also like others, might have been doing what I was. In looking back I realized I have been following her since 2010. Since October 2010 in fact. I figured that out by going through the old Facebook posts and seeing when I liked them. In 2011 my life must have been going merrily along while I was coursing through one online class or the other. 2012 began a bit more of a struggle and I seeking and yearning and hungry for her guidance after a horrible breakup. It amazed my how often I liked something or had been following her, but yet said nothing or did a thing about my life until I was struggling. I think sometimes that is what it takes for us to wake up.

The universe smacks us in the head and says

“Well, are you going to do something now?” I heeded that call and said “Hell Yes!” when I read Hell Yes Hell No on her site, I was hooked as well as so many other posts and mantras and Manifestos.

I love to see others share their life and share their struggles. Many people ask me as well, why do I say anything about what I have been through? I do so just as I think Stephanie and others who write and blog and share do, we have been there and we want to share in the event that by our sharing we can help another first know they are not alone and we love them and are there for them. That is why “I” do it anyway.  I will say I am truly grateful to Stephanie for sharing and opening up her life with us all. IT helped me immensely and her coaching is spot on.

If I know someone has been through my path I am more likely to get on board with classes, courses and caching because I feel they can relate. Well, this woman can relate. Let me tell you. In addition to that, she has the most tenderest, purest heart of any woman I probably know and yet at the same time will tell you to get up off your ass and get your shit in gear! LOL That is WHY I love her so much!

This is my vision of Stephanie. She may agree or not, but after following her, taking courses, having one on one coaching and now being in her Miracles Course…this is the woman “I” see and “I” think of when I think of her…

She has the heart of a kitten and the fire of a lion. She is soft like the wind, but if you stir her up, I bet a storm would be brewing. She is loving and kind, gentle and pure. She has empathy of life because she has been there and done that. She has pulled up her bootstraps a few times and dusted off the ashes from being burned. I know somehwere she has cried in ehr pillow and I know the next morning she decided it was better and would be a fabulous day. You know from her kindness and tenderness mixed with kick ass bad assness, that she is still a girl under it all and has a heart and feelings, but she will karate chop you if you mess with her!  She is determined, driven, audacious, amazing and to me…a miracle.

Don’t miss a chance to work with someone so freakin amazing… The next Miracles Course is coming soon. Don’t sit by like I did. Hop on board the Miracle Train with the rest of us and watch your life unfold. http://blissbombed.com/7-miracles/

OR check out the other amazing opportunities to work with her on her site http://blissbombed.com/

Until next time,

Xoxo

Trisha Trixie

Saturday Special: Guest Blog: Breaking the Gamer Code

Breaking the Gamer Code

By Michael Mandt

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Many non-gamers have come to me over the past few years and asked me about what it is to be a gamer. Not because they are necessarily looking to become a gamer, but to try and understand them, or even relate to them. I didn’t realize that this was a big issue at first. Is there some kind of great divide amongst gamers and non-gamers that I hadn’t really been aware of or privy to? Could there be a “gamer code” that can be analyzed and accessed by those who don’t know what a tabletop role-playing game is or how many cards are usually in a Magic the Gathering deck? I think there is something about gamers but that something isn’t as different from you as you might think.

So, what is a gamer? We could say that a gamer is anyone who plays games, but for this article we will define gamers as those individuals who more than enjoy hobby games like: Magic the Gathering, Dungeons and Dragons, World of Warcraft, Pathfinder, Talisman, Warhammer 40k, etc. These types of gamers are usually not casual players; they live their lives thinking about the game. What is the next step? How can I make my character better? What books, dice, or other accessories do I need to get? This drive and focus on the game is what sets gamers apart from those who are casual players or non-gamers.

What drives a gamer?

First off, obsession is not a way to describe most gamers. The terms I would like to use are, driven or focused. Gamers don’t usually live their games 24/7, but when they are at the table and the dice are in their hand, the great majority of them have left the world behind for a time to completely focus on their match or session. For a non-gamer, this might seem like something very strange. Yet, the same devotion to the gamer’s craft is the same that artists, craftsmen, people playing a sport, readers and movie goers experience while deep into their events.

Gaming is about the experience, the power, and about the social interaction. Yes, gamers like to be social! Even the most anti-social gamer enjoys showing others what they know about the game(s) that they love. The same way that a football quarterback throws a ball is in many ways like how a gamer designs their character or throws their dice. To a gamer, the sport is the intellectual application of the rules to achieve the best outcome—they want to kick ass and take names.

 How do you socialize with a gamer?

There are several things that a non-gamer can do to relate more to gamers. I could go into many examples of ways to respect and understand gamers, but for this article I will focus the top five.

Show interest in a game they love.

This really isn’t any different than talking with your friend, or significant other that isn’t a gamer. If you show interest in a game, a gamer is going to help show you why they love it, and how to be the best at it. The best way to become friends with a gamer, is to like some of the games they like to play. Now, sometimes, gamers won’t want to help teach a non-gamer how to play while they are in the middle of a tough match or a session, but just ask them nicely, “Can you teach me about this game when you have some time?” This will go a long way to getting around the drive or focus that most gamers have playing their game. Be patient with the gamer and they will respond when they have the time.

Don’t degrade what they do or how they dress.

Gamers are just like everyone else, they don’t like to be picked on. Telling a gamer that what they do is “weird” or “stupid” is the wrong thing to do, even even jest about. The game they have invested their time in is no different than a basketball player practicing for a game or a mechanic building a custom vehicle and collecting old muscle cars. In the moment of the game, it is their world and their character is their baby, just like that 1970 Dodge Challenger.

Gamers have been in their circles for awhile and many don’t have time or energy for things like staying up with the latest fashions or trends. If you think a gamer might look good in some type of clothing, just tell them, “Hey, I think you would look great in this!” You’ll get a lot more bugbears with honey than you will with giant wasps. Gamers will more than likely be happy to have someone looking out for them in this way, as long as your suggestions are not condescending. As a gamer myself, I am guilty of not being as trendy as others. I also know anytime that people give heartfelt advice about the way I look or maybe even another game I should look into, I will listen.

 Tell them straight that you like them.

For those who are looking to date a gamer, I could go into an entire article about techniques and advice, but the best advice I can give is, just ask them. In my experience, gamers are wonderful at understanding the complexities of the game, astrophysics, and complex number theories, but they aren’t as great at translating subtle hints. This may come from years of social isolation, fantasy immersion, or self-esteem issues. Just tell them how you feel, let them know you are interested and that you want to go out sometime and talk about their Warhammer army over coffee and donuts (the gamer equivalent might be mountain dew and pizza, but you get the idea).

This straight forward type of thing might not be what you are used to, but the gamer is not your usual prospective mate. Gamers are generally of a higher intelligence, loyalty, focus, and technologically skilled. While some gamers could rebuild your car, the majority would do better with rebuilding your computer or helping you with a long research paper or essay on English literature. Gamers are used to things being in rules, and dating is not usually something that you can read about in a book and know everything about. If you make yourself known to the gamer that you are interested and you want to go out, you will get much better results than using third parties or waiting for them to make the first move. One of the least favorite types games that a gamer likes to play are mind games.

Respect their time gaming

One of the number one questions I get about gamers from my non-gamer friends involves time. “Why is my boyfriend always playing magic?” “Why does D&D take five hours to play?” “I want my girlfriend to spend more time with me and less time playing World of Warcraft.” You are not alone, so first thing is, don’t panic. The gamer still enjoys being with you, they just are in the “gamer zone” and you will have to wait until they are out of it. Really, don’t try and control a gamer’s time during gaming by calling every 10 minutes, throwing their books or gaming system away, or deleting their characters. DON’T EVER MESS WITH A GAMERS GEAR. It is not the gear that you should be taking your frustrations out on, and if you do mess with a gamer’s gear, you might as well have just ended the relationship, because it’s over.

The best way to answer the time question, is to make time with them. Have a schedule, plan a date, or intimate dinner in advance. Don’t expect to be able to pull your significant other away from their scheduled event without a fight. You have to be patient, a gamer is deep in focus and just like a sport, they cannot stop until the game is over. Would you feel the same way about interrupting a tennis match, or a football game that your significant other is playing in? No, you would let them finish, it is no different with gamers. To pull the Dungeon Master away from the table, will ruin the night for all the othe players, just don’t do it. Wait until your gamer mate is done, and they will appreciate the patience you give them when it comes to their games. They will love you forever, if you accept that they love games and you.

Try and play a game with them.  

Even though you might not be a gamer, gamers love it when their friends, family, and significant others to play the games with them. You don’t have to be as hardcore or as driven as the gamer, but interest goes a long way to becoming a closer friend and understanding what they love. You might actually find out that you really like the games they play, and even become more interested in one game or another. One of the greatest feelings I’ve had with my friends is when I see them enjoying the games that I have introduced them too. Every time a girlfriend beat me in Magic, I was very happy to have introduced them to the game, I helped! And role-playing isn’t just something that you have to do at a table. Fantasy role-playing is great if you can enjoy it with the people you love. Girlfriends or boyfriends who really get into their characters can be great both at the table and when you are alone. Try interacting together in your characters outside of the game a little bit, I’ll bet you sparks fly.

In conclusion, gamers are like everyone else. If you prick them, they bleed; if you degrade them, they get sad; if you love them, they will love you. You may never be as driven and focused as the gamer, but you will find that most gamers are great friends to have. So, the next time you see a gamer that you don’t know go up and introduce yourself and see what they are into. You just might find that there is a little gamer inside you just waiting to roll initiative.

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Michael Mandt is an editor, writer and game organizer for www.chamberofchampions.com as well as lifelong gamer and role-player. Check him out on facebook at www.facebook.com/drakesylvan or at the Chamber of Champions website.

Mad Men Monday: Tribute to Mom in a Different World

I always have to smirk at the thing that happen on the show, most especially things mother’s say, how they act and how the children are as well. It was such a  different time then.

This little funny from “The Daily Beast” show Betty Draper in her true glory

Betty Draper (Mad Men)

Some mothers yell when their kids won’t eat their vegetables. Mad Men’s Betty Draper goes postal. From stuffing sweet potatoes in her daughter’s mouth to slapping her when she cuts her own hair, it’s easy to wonder why this “perfect” ’60s housewife had children in the first place

The new Mother in Law in Betty’s life is one of those irritating types. I have friends who have grandmothers such as this and we hated it when they had to visit or watch us. They were so mean

Then there is Joan’s Mom. Half the time she is a great help and the other half (or more than) she meddles and irritates Joan to no end. Isn’t that how mom’s are sometimes though?

Joan however as a new mom is trying hard to keep it all together, be back int eh workforce and raise her son up right with right morals and values by standing up for what she believes in early on.

Megan’s mom is seemingly delightful to everyone else, but Megan. I know a few mom’s of this nature

Megan on the other hand, is stuck in the limbo land of I am a hottie, I am a wife, or wait this weekend I have to be a mom. I have been there. Not an easy task

Many people forget Peggy as a part of the “mother” group. She did have a baby and she technically IS a mom. She does not see her child anymore and gave him up for adoption. Though some may not agree with her, I favor her decision to do what was right for her.

What I find intriguingly interesting was then when I did a search for Mad Men Mom, there was one missing from the mix. Trudy Campbell. I would have thought Peggy would have been, but no, nowhere to be found is Trudy. Trudy is solid and sturdy. She stands up for herself against Pete who is lame beyond all compare.  She has done well in standing up for her household and her values.

When thinking of Mother’s Day coming up, remember how it used to be and how it is now. The moms have changed and the kids too. No more are the days of shoes coming off and being used as a punishing instrument or wooden spoons or paddles. Mom’s used to let their kids out for hours and not care or worry where there were. Kids used to play with dry cleaning bags to anything they could find and the mom’s of the world did NOT think to worry.

I mention the kids because there is a song from Bucky Covington that makes me think about how different things were then from now. We used to drink out of  a hose, we used to run in the streets, and eheven mentions how mothers used to smoke and drink, and you know what, we survived…