What does it mean to Be Fabulous?
A good friend recently pointed out to me, that perhaps people don’t know what Fabulous means, what does one do, how does one act, etc. So I thought I would take today to comment on that.
The Free Dictonary defines it this way
1. Barely credible; astonishing: the fabulous endurance of a marathon runner.
2. Extremely pleasing or successful: a fabulous vacation.
a. Of the nature of a fable or myth; legendary.
b. Told of or celebrated in fables or legends.
[Middle English, mythical, from Old French fabuleux, from Latin fbulsus, from fbula, fable; see fable.]
Ok now how many other of you saw that word Legendary and thought of Barney Stinson? Ok me too, so here ya go, I just had to
1. Owning up to YOUR Fabulous
I feel that to Be Fabulous you need to have own up to your Fabulousness. You, who you are and how you are is ALREADY Fabulous! A phrase I learned from Stephanie St. Claire was “All things are already mine” I thought, “Snap, that is just like being Fabulous. There is nothing we have to do, or say or become, we already ARE Fabulous! just as we are!”
I don’t want to taut all these thing for who you have to be or how you are. You know who you are. Owning up to who you are, what type of person you are, what your body shape is or isn’t, what your life is and so on. Anyone, ANY…ONE can be Fabulous.
2-Attitude of Fabulous
Which means-Deciding you ARE Fabulous and then own it. Barney never had anyone tell him he was Legendary, he decided he was and then acted in that manner. I decided I was Fabulous and act in a manner that says so that works for me. That is important because perhaps you are shy. It is not like you are going to start shouting from the rooftops (though I would) I am FABULOUS! Do what feels comfortable to own it, but if you get a chance to step outside of the shell, I think you will find new fabulousness waiting you never knew existed.
Most importantly, have a positive attitude, be grateful for your life and what you have, who you are, desire to be kind to another, and have dignity and integrity. Smile, be happy, compliment others, take compliments well, enjoy life, enjoy all things of life, good AND bad. Be confident, go out once in awhile, clean up or do your makeup daily, even if you are not going out, a little mascara, blush and balm always help me feel fabulous. If you are not a makeup wearer, or perhaps a guy reading this, do whatever it takes to keep yourself clean and groomed. When I was very down because of a break up, once I crawled out from under the covers and at least brushed my hair and washed my face, I feel SO much better. Feeling good, makes you feel happy, when you are happy, others are happy, when others and you are happy you tend to start feeling fabulous.
This can get confused with arrogance, but I seem to notice that those who say I am arrogant are actually ones not confident with themselves. They have a deeper insecurity perhaps or they were raised not to be proud or boastful and think you are being outlandish. I say, GOOD! Be outlandish if you desire to be. You might have to test out that Fabulous Confidence a bit to find the right blend that works for you.
If you constantly feel out of your element in what you think acting and owning Fabulous means, maybe tone it down a notch or two. If you feel like you are not quite there, amp it up! Be you, Be Fabulous You.
There are books and I will give you a few to read, with caution.
One of the first things I see a LOT of these books say I get a new wardrobe. Now, maybe you NEED a new wardrobe, but maybe you don’t. Most likely you just need a good friend or someone you trust or even a Fashion Advisor to help you leverage the items you already have and make your wardrobe better. That COULD be the case. But I don’t want you thinking that you need to rush out and buy a new wardrobe.
My sister loves flannel shirts. That is her. She is a flannel shirt girl. Would that work for me? No. But let me tell you, she rocks the flannel shirt and it works for her. Does she look amazing when she dresses up? Sure don’t we all, but that doesn’t mean she can’t rock that flannel shirt and still be fabulous because she can.
Ok so here are some books…
Fabulosity: What It Is & How to Get It – Kimora Lee Simmons.
and my idol…
Style A to Zoe: The Art of Fashion, Beauty, & Everything Glamour Rachel Zoe.
5-Keep it Together
Ok so another rant. I feel most fabulous when my home and desk and life are clean and organized. I love wwwFlylady.com and how she helps others to get their life clean and ways to STAY Clean. But I also know a few people who throw things on the floor and all about and if you clean it they have no clue where anything is. Being clean and organized is great and I think for me it makes a vast difference.
Again, try what works for you. Go to Fly Lady and test out her methods. They are very simple and I love how easy they integrate into other things in my life. I now have these habits because of her (even if nothing else gets done)…
Always put my shoes on
Swish the toilet with a brush daily
Always keep my sink clean and shiny
and like I said I add one, groom myself daily
6- Love Yourself
If you don’t love you, who will? You are your own best friend and your own worst enemy. Don’t let the self talk be negative talk. Let it be positive, uplifting talk. No mean talk to yourself. Let go of your past and those who hurt you. Decide you are NOT a victim anymore. You are Fabulous.
If you feel this is hard to do I have a suggestion for you. Read how I went from Fragile to Fabulous
There is SO much more to my story and if you really want to know, there is a whole blog for you to read at As Days Go By
The short version of that is I lost my father at young age, I was molested, raped, beaten, bruised, divorce, lost custody of children, struggled, was homeless, lost businesses, sacrificed and lived a lot of my life feeling like I was a victim. If you have been through something, I probably have to or something like it. I look at those things in my life as experiences to help me to help you.
If I can smile and look life in the face of it all and Be Fabulous…YOU can too!
If you are friendly to others, they will want to be your friend. Fabulous people attract friends because people are drawn to them. Say hi. Compliment others. Talk about similar likes and once in awhile dislikes (just don’t get hung up on the negative). Smile. Be inviting to things or groups you are in. If you see others standing alone, invite them in. If you are the one alone, and someone else invites you, go try it out. Be engaging and discuss things with them. To have a friend is to be a friend.
Laugh. Smile. Watch comedy shows if need be. Just enjoy life. don’t worry about what others think, just go do and be what you like to do to have fun. Ok, disclaimer…if you are a psychopath and like to kill others for fun please don’t do that. But if you want to swing on swings, do it (which btw is my like ultimate favorite thing to do in like always) . If you want to plank on the hot ground, do it. If you want to be silly, do it. If you want to crochet all day or knit or sew, do it. YOU know what you like to do for fun and what fun means to you. Do that and be that.
If you DON”T know what fun means, try some things out until you do.
I also have a De-Suckify List I learned from Leonie Dawson. I made a list of things to do when I feel life suck or I am not “in a good mood” On my list”
Watch a funny movie
Play Fun Music
Take a shower
9-Stay True to You
I am making some suggestions for things, but I want you to stay true to you as well. Don’t change just to change. Change, grow evolve because you desire to. Don’t EVER change for someone else or compromise your boundaries or values. You know what you feel comfortable with and you generally know when you have crossed the line. If you do cross it and you don’t feel right, remember that you can ALWAYS walk away. If it doesn’t fit, feel right, or more uncomfortable than you can be, then try something else, walk way. Above all, be you.
On this last note, I want to share how I go about Being and Feeling Fabulous. Some of you who know me personally already know some of these things and will sit there nodding your head saying to yourself “Yep, that Trixie!”
*I wake happy. If I am not happy, I get happy.
*Limit my time online (I actually set a timer)
*While online enjoy positive and uplifting things*Do what I want each day. Seriously. Some days I get up and want to work in my studio. Some days I want to lie around and watch movies. Now I realize that not everyone has the life I have, but even so, do what you want and enjoy it. IF you are not enjoying it, why are you doing it?
*I listen to uplifting music during the day.
*Take regular breaks
*Go to events
*Socialize with others
*Take Chances and Leaps for things I desire and goals I am reaching for
*Meet new people everywhere I go
*Say Hello Fabulous to others often
*Say Be Fabulous instead of saying goodbye
*Be VERY Happy and smile…ALOT
*Be audacious and ostentatious (basically be “over the top”)
*Live vicariously thru myself
I quote what I said on FB
“I’m every man’s dream and every girls inspiration. I’m awesome in a FABULOUS package. I’m confident strong and determined. Success is my only option failures not. I live life vicariously thru myself. I enjoy the show. I protect my soul house fiercely. My boundary lines are unmovable. I’m Authentic Real Unique. I’m me.”
I close with what I said on my picture for today. I am not perfect. Hell, none of us are. But I own up to the me I am. I own up to my successes as well as my failures. I am no longer breakable. I am no longer a victim. I am me….and I am…